These customers are impossible to resolve their issues.
They refuse to resolve things and find new issues after previous ones are resolved.
They waste your time. If you do decide to work with them, they end up wasting your team’s time.
They are “the customer from Hell!”
How can you discover which customers have unresolved conflicts, and avoid them?
While working in radio I discovered Jacques Werth’s (High Probability Selling) process called Trust and Respect. Trust & Respect identifies customers who have conflicts before you do business with them.
Trust and Respect is a regression question process used by psychiatrists to help them identify patients’ issues and work to resolve them.
If you can ask questions, listen, and show interest, you can discover whether someone has unresolved conflicts.
There are several obstacles to Werth’s method:
I’ve rarely found anyone who had difficulty with the questions. People rarely are asked these questions. When asked sincerely and with interest, few object. When someone does object, for example, one person asked, “What’s this have to do with the coaching process?” it indicates they prefer not to answer. They may want to hide something.
Your Best Customers Are People You Trust & Respect
If you ranked your best customers on a scale of 0-10 with 0 being no trust and respect, and 10 being the highest trust and respect imaginable, your best customers are those you would give a ten. Conversely, they would probably give you a ten as well.
While the questions dig deep and ask for insight into the prospect’s lives, the bonus is once you’ve completed the questions and discovered whether the person has an unresolved conflict (most don’t), you gain a deeper sense of rapport and trust in your relationship than anyone competing for the business could achieve.
Relationship building is a prime component in getting the sale.
If you discover they have an unresolved conflict, simply bow out of the sales process, saying, “I don’t feel we’d be a good fit for you.”
Trust & Respect
Download the lengthier T&R Inquiry Process for more details on how to use this.
Discover a conflict. How it worked through may uncover this person is still bitter or holds a grudge against the person they had the conflict with. That’s your indication they have an unresolved conflict.
At times you may find they have unresolved conflicts with a brother, sister, or parent. They recognize it, worked to resolve it, and accepted the situation as unresolvable, choosing to avoid continuing the relationship.
In my regression, I was preschool age. It was my turn to do the laundry with my mom. I’d been able to get out of it until my mom remembered my brother had done it last time. I was upset. During a break in cleaning our dirty underwear, I went outside, approached my brother, and told him mom had given me permission to slap him. When it was discovered what I did I was punished severely.
The lesson stuck. I’ve never struck anyone again.
Discover Conflict
The meeting quickly ended, and upon escaping out of the restaurant, Jacques’ friend offered “I’m so glad I brought you with me. I can’t believe I ever wanted to do business with those people. I’m happy to have avoided that!”
You Can't Win
People with unresolved conflicts are impossible to please. They constantly use you, or anyone else to attempt to resolve a conflict from their childhood that remains unresolved. Having not resolved them, they attempt to find a resolution with you.
You cannot win, because even if you gain resolution, their unresolved issues will bring them back with another issue to prove their right.
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